Book review: Dead to the World

[This review contains many, many spoilers.]

"I figured God had made me with the disability of telepathy, and he could cut me a little slack on the sex thing."

Synopsis

Eric is cursed by witches with an inconvenient case of amnesia, and Sookie hides him in her house while the Fangtasia vamps search for the coven that did it. Amnesia has changed Eric's personality rather drastically, and he and Sookie get romantically involved and have a whole lot of sex.

Jason, who has been dating werepanther Crystal Norris from the tiny hamlet of Hotshot, disappears without a trace. Sookie thinks it is related to the witches, but with the help of Calvin Norris, the "packmaster" of Hotshot, she eventually discovers that Jason was held and repeatedly bitten by a romantic rival, werepanther Felton Norris, in hopes that it would turn Jason into a hybrid were.

Bill reveals to Alcide and the rest of his pack the extent of Debbie Pelt's evil deeds in the previous book (that she participated in Bill's torture and that she locked Sookie in the car trunk with Bill, hoping he would kill her). Alcide abjures Debbie, which is sort of like werewolf divorce. Debbie later shows up in Sookie's kitchen with a shotgun, Eric takes the bullet meant for Sookie, and Sookie kills Debbie.

The book culminates in a "witch war," with an alliance of the vampires, werewolves and wiccans of Bon Temps vanquishing the evil coven. Eric gets his memory back, but doesn't remember what happened while he was "out", including his love affair with Sookie or what happened to Debbie Pelt.

Review

Sookie's new year's resolution is to not get beat up any more, and staying away from supes appears to be a good first step. But she inadvertently gets even more deeply involved in the supernatural side of Bon Temps when Eric shows up by the side of the road with no memory.

Eric, the normal Eric, is tall, handsome, sexy, funny, charming, obsessed with Sookie... and cold, arrogant, and overbearing. Sookie would never get involved with the real Eric. But amnesiac Eric is tall, handsome, sexy, funny, charming, obsessed with Sookie... and sweet, thoughtful, and accessible. Is this the person Eric was when he was a human, centuries ago? (Doesn't seem Viking-like to me, but I loved it.)

I know I've said it before, but I find Eric to be a much stronger male lead than Bill or Alcide, and a much more intriguing love interest for Sookie. This is one of the best books in the series, and where is Bill? He spends most of the book in Peru.

Our supernatural 'verse expands to include witches and fairies. Claudine the fairy is very entertaining; the metaphor of fairy blood as chocolate for vampires is fun. There is more werewolf lore, too. Well, actually, more of a werewolf lodge. I will again say that werewolves do nothing for me. But the shape shifters in this series aren't just werewolves, and the strange werepanthers of the tiny hamlet of Hotshot are interesting as well as weirdly compelling. And Alcide would be pretty much perfect for Sookie if he weren't hung up on the (now late) Debbie Pelt.

The first time I read this book, I so wanted Sookie to fall for Eric, for his amnesia to bring down the barriers between them, but I didn't think it would happen. And I was delighted that it did. For several reasons, mostly Eric-related, this one is a favorite.

Bits and pieces:

-- The action in this installment begins in the same month as "Club Dead."

-- Bill reveals to Sookie that he couldn't resist Lorena because she was his maker.

-- Merlottes' waitresses Holly and Danielle are wiccans.

-- Tara is still dating vampire Franklin Mott.

-- We are introduced to Colonel Flood, Alcide's packmaster.

-- Sookie considers polite, principled Calvin Norris a marital possibility because supes are really her only romantic option. But his motivation confuses me. He says that Hotshot needs new genes, but I thought pure-bred shifters were important?

-- After taking werewolf Maria-Star Cooper to the hospital, Sookie falls asleep behind the wheel of her car. Claudine appears in Sookie's car and wakes her, and reveals that she's a fairy (pointed ears).

-- We learn that Bubba is brain damaged and therefore doesn't need an invitation to get into a human's home. That felt a lot like a retro fix of a major boo-boo in "Club Dead."

-- Sookie came out of this one with beautiful memories, $50,000, and a gorgeous cranberry red winter coat. All three from Eric.

Television series notes

Much of what happened in the book made it to the screen this time. I think the book fans would have had a cow and revolted en masse if the Sookie/Eric love affair had been changed. Although the ending was changed a bit, since series Eric did remember what happened, and his role in Debbie's death was eliminated. I rather liked that Eric remembered it all.

The Hotshot story is quite different. In the television series, Calvin Norris is a meth dealer and evil, to boot. And Jason is held in Hotshot for breeding purposes.

Quotes:

I don't usually include quotes, but I loved a few of them in this book so much that I wanted to share them.

-- "I turned in about midnight, leaving Eric absorbed in my tapes of the first season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. (Though welcome, these were actually a gag gift from Tara.) Eric thought the show was a hoot, especially the way the vampires' foreheads bulged out when they got blood-lusty. From time to time, I could hear Eric laughing all the way back in my room."

-- "I had two whole days off, and at least one of them I got to spend alone in a house with a mentally ill vampire. Life just didn't get any better."

-- "I had two cups of coffee, put Eric's jeans in the washer, read a romance for awhile, and studied my brand new Word-of-the-Day calendar, a Christmas gift from Arlene. My first word for the new year was 'exsanguinate.' This was probably not a good omen."

-- "I'd rather be taking a complicated drink order from a table of drunken tree trimmers than be first in the line of battle."

In closing...

I loved this one. It's a complete series changer, and I think it deserves a solid four out of four stakes.

My next book review, "Dead as a Doornail," will be posted in mid-January.

Important notice! After eleven books and four seasons of the series, I have no idea what kind of spoiler limitations to put on the comments section under these circumstances -- so I'm not going to put any. It's a spoiler free for all! If you're new to the books and haven't seen all of the television series True Blood, reading the comments may, and probably will, spoil you. Read on at your own risk!

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Justified: The Moonshine War

"So you want to transfer me?"
"Honestly, Raylan, I don't know who would take you."

Clean up and put away season one. Yank out a brand new story for season two. You'd think it would be disjointed, but this episode flowed beautifully from one major plotline to another.

They started by repeating a portion of the awesome climactic gun battle in "Bulletville" and then proceeded to tie up the Miami cartel plot thread in a satisfying way. This is a good thing. The Miami cartel stuff suffered from being too far removed from Kentucky, at least until it was embodied by the late and unlamented Bo Crowder. Although I guess it's always possible that Gio will be stupid and change his mind. I guess it depends on how fond he was of Ernesto and Tommy Bucks, and if he was intimidated by Raylan's old boss Dan Grant.

(I loved the paperwork and internal investigations sequence. It made complete sense, after all that happened in the last couple of episodes.)

The introduction to the Bennett crime family happened sort of sideways because a pervert was pursuing fourteen-year-old Loretta McCready, and her father made the fatal mistake of reporting it. Raylan's rescue with the gasoline was smart as well as fun, although it bothered me that Loretta was tied up and helpless right above the gas tank of that car.

I immediately liked Loretta McCready. Terrific young actress, and Loretta's courage in facing down a full-grown man who was planning to sexually victimize her was impressive. Jimmy Earl Dean was interesting casting, since television usually has skeezy-looking individuals play child molesters, and he was an outgoing, good-looking young man. At least he was until Loretta led him into that fishing hook trap. That looked horribly painful.

As bad as Dean was, though, the Bennetts left him in the shade. Doyle Bennett is a local, very crooked cop, and Coover Bennett is dumb, mean and nasty. But Dickie strikes me as the worst of the three. He seemed friendly and rational next to the stoned, rat-shooting Coover, but his smile was artificial. (Don't they call that a "crocodile grin"?) Forcing Walt McCready to voluntarily put his foot into a bear trap was about as horrible as it could be.

But it was Mags Bennett that blew me away. When we first met her in her little general store, she seemed like a rather nice middle-aged woman who happened to make money growing and selling weed, someone who would never have anything to do with, say, forcing a man to put his foot into a bear trap. But the way she murdered Walt McCready with the poisoned "apple pie" was just chilling. For me, the most frightening thing about it was Mags telling McCready that she would raise his daughter. What a horrible thing to contemplate in your last moments on earth. (I was also creeped out by the way Dickie caressed McCready's hair.)

The bizarre violence in this episode, mostly perpetrated on the body of the unfortunate Walt McCready, was memorable. It certainly let us know that the Bennetts are very scary people. And Mags is the worst because it was all at her direction. She's the boss, a sort of modern day Ma Barker with a trio of criminal sons. Mom and "apple pie". Wow.

In other news, Raylan was asking around about Boyd all through the episode, with no success. But there he was in the final scene, once again blowing shit up -- but this time, legitimately. Boyd is going straight and digging coal again. I wonder how long that will last?

Bits and pieces:

-- The season two cast is the same as season one, but with the welcome addition of Walton Goggins. It's no secret that I love both Timothy Olyphant and Walton Goggins in these roles. They could very well be my favorite frenemies.

-- Raylan doesn't want to go back to Miami now. It's a little sad that Art wants so badly to get rid of him.

-- Raylan went back to his motel room and found crime scene tape on the door, tape outlines of bodies on the floor, and bloodstains on the bed. Not funny, but the visual made me laugh. There's no place like home.

-- Arlo slightly redeemed himself by not telling the cops that Raylan deliberately shot him. I said "slightly".

-- Rachel took Raylan along because she was uncomfortable dealing with "his people". She was right that the people in Harlan mostly treated her with distant coolness. And Coover called her a "negress." Some serious distance from politically correct.

-- Kentucky state trooper Tom Bergen was in several scenes. Fun character. I liked him.

-- Winona and Raylan ended up in bed again. But she didn't take the ring off this time.

-- Mags said that what killed McCready was "medicine" and "all natural" and that it had been handed down from her grandmother and her grandmother's grandmother. Multi-generational poison. Wow. My grandmother was frightening, but she never passed the recipe for a homemade poison down to me.

-- Two of the three Bennett brothers, Dickie and Coover, are played by Lost alumni Jeremy Davies and Brad William Henke. Margo Martindale and Brad William Henke also had key continuing roles in the early seasons of Dexter.

-- Gold acting stars for Margo Martindale (Mags) and Chris Mulkey (McCready), especially in that final scene. Outstanding.

Quotes:

Raylan: "I didn't think you missed me."
Dan: "You know, I had a wart once when I was a kid."

Tim: "Relinquishing a firearm can be a very emotional moment. There always must be another deputy in attendance. Add in some premium alcohol, what could possibly go wrong?"

Tim: "What you gonna get next?"
Raylan: "Probably the same thing."
Art: "You should think about an Uzi."

Raylan: "Who we going after?"
Rachel: "Jimmy Earl Dean."
Raylan: "Three first names. A triple winner, right off the bat."

Loretta: "Any man over eighteen talking to me about my period is a pervert. Shit. Any man, period, talking to me about my period."

Mags: "All the troubles of your hard life, it's all gone now. You get to know the mystery, Walt. You get to see your Sally Ann again."

Raylan: "Son of a bitch."
Winona: "Yeah. That's what a girl wants to hear for pillow talk. Regret."

They managed to completely change direction without giving the viewer whiplash. Four out of four bear traps,

Billie

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Game Review: Star Wars: The Old Republic

(Video Game - PC)

Once in a while there is a franchise that is so massive, so pervasive that it literally transcends its original media. Star Wars broke that barrier decades ago. Movies, television, toys, books, comics, trading cards, a pen & paper role-playing game, and of course, video games.

There have been a lot of Star Wars video games, from the side-scrolling Super Star Wars trilogy to more modern fare like Star Wars The Force Unleashed. For the most part they stick to movie cannon, and are set within the confines of the movie timeline. In 2003, a company called Bioware released a game based on a comic series called Knights of the Old Republic (commonly abbreviated as KOTOR). This wildly divergent tale is set millennia before the adventures of Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader.

Against this backdrop of what is essentially a blank slate with a Star Wars setting, they crafted a game that was extremely ambitious and story driven. It was the first Star Wars game that attempted to bring RPG (role-playing game) aspects to the material. It was widely popular and spawned a successful, albeit slightly flawed, sequel a year later. Then there was nothing. Some rumors of a second sequel in the works, that was eventually cancelled. Then in October of 2008, nearly four years after KOTOR II was released, Bioware announced that they were working on something big. The announcement was for a massively multiplayer online role-playing game (MMORPG) called Star Wars: The Old Republic (commonly abbreviated to SWTOR or TOR). To really drive up the excitement, they coupled the announcement with this: SWTOR: Deceived Trailer. It promised to be a game so big that it could take a player a couple hundred hours to complete a single story line, and they were talking about having several story lines.

Three years since that announcement, and I can tell you this -- it was worth the wait! There are in fact eight (yes, eight) complete story lines, each easily totaling in the hundred and fifty hour time frame. That would be impressive enough, but it is also fully voiced and animated. I've been playing it now for a couple of weeks, and I have explored all of the starter content and several worlds in the greater galaxy. I couldn't possibly review all the aspects of this, since it would take months to have that good a picture of the whole. Still, there are some great things, some good things, some bad things, and some decidedly ugly things about this game that I can pass on to you.

It breaks down pretty simply. Set approximately 3,000 years before the first movie, it is a time where the Sith Empire has come out of hiding from the outer edge of the galaxy rim to devastate the Galactic Republic. This isn't Luke and Vader duking it out one on one. We're talking thousands of Jedi and Sith going lightsaber to lightsaber. This galactic war has hit a stalemate with the invasion of the Republic core world (Coruscant) as depicted in the trailer I've linked to above. This uneasy peace has left the galaxy at the edge of total destruction, as both Republic and Imperial forces are building up for a final confrontation. This elegant set-up allows players to pick sides, and to choose from one of four classes per side. There are two types of both Jedi and Sith: an Imperial Agent which plays like a space age James Bond, a Smuggler (like Han Solo), a Republic Trooper (Storm Trooper complete with white armor), and a Bounty Hunter (Boba Fett).

The Great:

For three years Bioware touted the so called "Forth Pillar" of the MMO experience, story. Well, they have delivered in excess. There are unique storylines for each of the eight classes. It is very engaging, since all the dialogue is voiced by talented actors and written by people who can actually write a story. Gone is the stilted conversations and clichéd writing of George Lucas. Instead, there are specific tributes to his good choices. There is so much in this game that all six movies could fit into one of the class stories. You feel important to this setting, as if you are really making a difference in a galaxy at the precipice of another massive war that threatens to destroy entire solar systems.

Everything feels like Star Wars, but different. There's all the races you've come to know from the movies, plus some stuff that you've never heard of. Then there are the planets. Getting to walk on Coruscant or Tatooine is a really pleasure. Playing a Smuggler and walking onto your own ship and walking side by side with your own Wookie sidekick is really fun. Playing a Sith and throwing lightning from your finger tips never gets old. Turning on your lightsaber and jumping into the fray as a Jedi feels just as exhilarating as it does in the movies. There are features in this game that truly make the experience cinematic and compelling. That Wookie sidekick is one of them. He is what is called a companion character. These companions fight with you, and co-exist with you as you progress through the game. They have fully fleshed out personalities, and you can even strike up a romantic relationship with them. (Which makes it sound like I'm hot for Wookies, but non-humanoid romances are not allowed quite yet. Neither are same sex relationships, although I hear that might change.)

The Good:

The graphics are interesting and subtle, but not top end. There are some low resolution textures and some lip syncing issues, but for the most part it is a lot of fun to watch your character interact with NPC's (non-player characters). Conversations are done with an interactive cut-scene. These can be extremely active and action packed, but are primarily used for exposition. Several camera angles are used to create some visual interest, and it is nice to see your character up close as they throw out some witty response. This is also how the story unfolds, and it gives weight to the missions you have to go out into the world to perform. There is also choice in these conversations, although it usually boils down to good, bad, and neutral.

Combat is really fun, and each class feels important to a group. There are four basic class structures, which are mirrored for Republic and Empire, and then two advanced classes per base class. Which means there are sixteen total possible avenues to chose from. Additionally, there are three talent trees per advance class, which make that advance class play fairly differently. This gives the player a lot of options, and enough variety that you feel pretty unique in some regards. However, once you pick an advanced class, you're locked into it. Much like your dialogue choices, there is no reset button. Given the malleability of most MMO's of late, this is an interesting choice by the designers. It forces the players to consider their choices instead of just clicking past content.

The Bad:

Although the graphics are good, they do detract a little from the experience. They are far and above the original KOTOR, and I really like some of the beautiful vistas and character/npc/beast designs. But there are only so many NPC faces, and after a while you do start to see some repetition. Also, there are only so many interior designs, and after a while you see these same spaces redressed and repositioned. It isn't really a detractor, but it can be a little distracting.

As much as I love the dialogue, and the choices you get to make in conversations, there is so much of it that it can get a little tiresome. But complaining about too much of a good thing isn't really a gripe. This brings me to the problem with world content. World content isn't required, and there are enough options that you could forgo doing this content. But each world has a set story and specific quests that aren't unique to the class. Although you still get your specific class story on each world, the rest is the same for everyone. This is really fun and engaging the first time through, but if you play any alternate characters, it can get a little repetitive.

The Ugly:

Mirrors, mirrors everywhere... and I do mean everywhere. The Republic and Empire are light and dark mirrors of each other. The four classes per side are the same only redressed, quests are frequently the same on both sides just redressed with different races, settings, and dialogue. This is recurring throughout the game, and although I completely understand the reasons behind this choice, it is one of the things that bothers me the most about the game. Budget and time constraints, balance between the two factions, and the desire to give the same level of experience are the contributing factors here. I have no real argument with those reasons, but I feel a little cheated.

Other than these few minor issues, I think this is a wonderful game, and I believe it is innovative in ways I can't fully express in a few pages. It has a truly engaging story experience and a really fun gameplay model. The action feels exciting, and it makes you feel like an action hero from level 1. I hope over the coming years this will continue to be a game I go back to again and again.

It is hard to rate something like this, because even with the dozens of hours of game time I've already put in, I've barely scratched the surface of the total content. Still, if I have to give a rating, I would give it 3.5 out of 4 double bladed lightsabers.

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Eureka: I'll Be Seeing You

… in which Allison’s life is on the line while Grant and Carter go Back to the Future, Part 2.

Although Allison’s sudden death provided the narrative momentum for the bulk of this mid-season finale, it was actually a pretty fun episode, and I guess that bizarre juxtaposition is my primary quibble with the story. Allison died part way into the episode, devastating Carter, Henry, and Grant, and yet I didn’t find myself remotely moved or otherwise torn up by this development. Moreover, my residual impression of the story was that we’d just taken a fun, breezy romp Back to the Future. I never had any doubt that Allison’s untimely demise would be reversed, and because things quickly took a comedic turn once Grant and Carter went back in time, I never really felt the full impact of her death on Carter. Sure we got a few moments with him holding her lifeless body next to the Jeep, then going into angry, vengeance mode, but that pathos was quickly abandoned and, for the most part, everything that happened in the past felt like a fun adventure to avert the latest disaster-of-the-week, instead of a desperate effort to save the love of Carter’s life. I know Eureka is often at its best in lighthearted mode, but shouldn’t an episode in which Carter faces the very real possibility of losing the woman he loves --- especially so soon after finding happiness with her --- feel more substantial? Shouldn’t we share his agonizing grief and feel emotionally engaged by his plight? I guess that kind of dramatic weight is just too hard to carry when the audience is pretty well convinced the “death” is only temporary and that the success of the mission is never in doubt.

All that said, I did rather enjoy revisiting the season premiere through a Back to the Future, Part 2 lens, and thought we got decent closure for Dr. Grant’s arc. It makes sense that given all he’s experienced in his time in the future that Grant would somewhat hesitantly take the chance Beverly offered to set things right. As a man out of time, he’s certainly struggled to fit in and to find a sense of purpose, and he’s understandably less than thrilled with the way his dream of “protecting us from ourselves” has turned out. Beverly’s offer gave him the chance to hit the reset button on all these things. To change history and make a difference. To be “the me that never was.” Even without Beverly’s “you’ll be a god” ego-stroking, how could he refuse this chance?

So, I didn’t begrudge Grant his choice, but was certainly glad to see that his good intentions didn’t mean a damn to him, once he learned he’d inadvertently killed Allison. She and Henry were the two true friends that he’d made in the future, and I think the thought of losing her made him reassess his priorities and realize that he wasn’t as much “a man out of time” as he thought. When it came down to it, preserving Allison’s life and her future, and getting back to the place he’s started to think of as home, were what really mattered to him, even if it meant taking Adam’s life to ensure success. “He’ll die.” “She’ll live. You want to choose?” Fortunately, it didn’t come to that --- especially since that likely would have made it difficult for Carter and Grant to return to the same future they left --- and Grant learned that, for the most part, you can’t remake history or take back the things you’ve done. What’s done is done, and the best you can do is learn from your mistakes and focus “on what we can do to change things moving forward, not looking back.”

Other Thoughts

I liked the reveal that Grant and his cohorts were planning to use the bridge to jump back in time and prevent the atomic bomb from ever being developed. It provided some interesting context for his personal epiphany about the dangers of looking to the past, instead of the future.

Fargo: “Hello, cop types? Bad guys ain’t gonna find themselves.”
[Jo and Carter exchange looks and start walking away.]
Carter: “Is he getting bossier?”
Jo: “I kind of like it.”

Andy keeping an eye on Zane in the holding cell was hilarious. “What?”

Jo and Henry being so tickled about Allison and Carter finally getting together made for some nice little character moments.

So, did anyone out there really believe that Allison would stay dead? I know Eureka hates to let its couples be happy and all, but as I’ve said before, it’s no Joss Whedon show.

Grant: “Now look what you’ve done. And, thanks to you, I lost my hat!”
Carter (angry disbelief): “Your HAT!!! You --- killed her.”
Grant: “What?”
Carter: “Allison’s dead.”

Grant: “I swear I never meant to hurt anyone.”
Carter: “No, you just helped Beverly Barlowe steal the doomsday device to travel back in time.”
Grant: “Hey, I’m not here for Beverly. I’m here for me. Jack, I’m a man out of time. This was my chance to fix things that got broken the last time I left.”

Carter: “Excuse me. I’m looking for a naked man.”
Doctor: “You don’t say?”
Carter: “Erg. I’m looking for a … little naked fella. Th--- okay. Y--- I’m good.”

Carter: “What is it with you guys and ‘theoretically’?”

Carter (driving at full speed towards the gorge): “I trust me. I trust me. I trust me. […] Oh crap! I DON’T TRUST ME!!!”

So why did Grant and Carter morph into themselves in the future, before they had a chance to go back to the past? Doesn’t that negate the loop? Wouldn’t they still need to go back, so they could make the recording, so Carter could hear the recording, then save Allison? Why didn’t the writers just have Grant and Carter disappear, then pop back onto the scene a few minutes later? Didn’t they just create a paradox?

Sigh. I’ll never understand the time travel philosophy on this show. Sometimes it is a “whatever happened, happened” approach. Sometimes it is a “you can overwrite history” approach. Sometimes it is a “you can create a parallel timeline that will eventually collapse into the original timeline, thus destroying the universe” approach. Consistency, thy name is not Eureka.

I loved that the key to saving Allison was giving her those few extra seconds to latch her seat beat. Seat belts save lives, people!

Henry: “Well, I think we can all relate to making bad choices with good intentions. Well, at least, I can at any rate.”

Some good incremental development on the Jo and Zane front. Of course Zane wouldn’t let the business with Jo having his grandmother’s ring go. “I’m not stupid. I know something’s happened with the five of you, and part of it had to do with us." And, despite the Zoe roadblock, I’m sure he’ll keep on pushing to find out what’s going on. Yea!

Zane: “Tell me what we were to each other.”
Jo: “Nothing. I gotta go.”
[He grabs her and they kiss passionately.]
Zane: “Then why didn’t that feel like a first kiss?”

Grant: “I’ll be seeing you, sport.”
Carter: “Hey, don’t call me ‘sport.’”

I was rather sad to see Grant go at the end. He’s really grown on me, and even though this was a fitting conclusion for his story, I’ll miss him. I hope he’s right, and we will be seeing him again, somewhere down the line.

So Beverly has a new target in mind. Carter or Allison? Or Carter and Allison? What exactly is she targeting them for? Does she think they can help her change history and make the world a better place? Or is she just trying to expand her base of power and influence in the present? She’s always been presented as an evil, manipulative bitch, and I just can’t accept that she’s really got the world’s best interests at heart. I suppose time will tell.

Final Analysis: A bit of a jarring disconnect between plot driver and the overall tone, but still an enjoyable mid-season finale.

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Eureka: The Ex-Files

… in which Grant struggles with Global’s role as a Department of Defense facility, while several characters are visited by figures from their pasts.

Well, that was a very fun and full episode. Lots and lots of developments to ponder. After much wrestling with how to approach things, I’ve decided to just break down my thoughts by character/development.

Carter. I love the idea of our characters having to confront manifestations of their fears and insecurities, and it was wonderful to have Stark briefly return, but I’m not entirely convinced he was the best representation of Carter’s unresolved issues. Actually, scratch that. It makes sense that he would manifest Stark, given that Stark was his competition for Allison’s affections for so long, and that he ultimately lost out to Stark. I can understand Carter feeling a certain level of inadequacy regarding the “shoes he had to fill” to win Allison’s heart. After all, he’s only getting his shot with her now, because Stark died. But it didn’t make a lick of sense that the way Carter “resolved” his fears and made Stark vanish was to confess his long-standing love for Allison. So telling her you’ve always loved her eliminates your fears of inadequacy? Really? I guess I just don’t get how revealing that would suddenly put Carter’s mind at ease and help him move past his fear.

Allison. I’m also not quite sure that Tess was the best representation of Allison’s fears. If her chief concern was feeling guilty for hooking up with her friend’s ex, then I’d get it. But the fear holding Allison back was the possibility of losing another man she loves to tragedy, and contrary to Head Tess’s claims, she wasn’t actually around when Allison lost Stark. Regardless, this issue was a really fantastic one to tackle. As noted previously, I considered the possibility that Allison would harbor reservations about getting involved with Carter because she wouldn’t want to risk losing her best friend if the relationship soured. It never occurred to me that Carter’s job would be a stumbling block. But, after losing the fathers of both her children, of course Allison would be terrified not just of losing her best friend, but of losing the man she loves too soon. I would think, given the extreme hazards he faces almost daily, her fear of losing Carter would be practically paralyzing! Fortunately, Allison is a far braver woman than I am, and she is not “too scared to miss out on us.” Yea, for breakfast!

Jo and Zane. I’m really glad that Jo’s hallucination inadvertently led to her revealing a bit too much to the real Zane. (I should have been expecting that the whole time, but it wasn’t until she started unburdening herself that I realized what was about to happen.) I’m not particularly thrilled with the conclusions that she reached during her soul searching, but I’m glad that Zane (once he gets out of his current jam) is going to have lots of questions, forcing her to confront this issue a bit more. Because, I’ve gotta say, I’m not buying this notion that Jo and Zane don’t work, and that she’s just romanticizing what they had. She accepted Other Zane’s proposal before she realized things had changed, because she was ready to marry him. They were together for two years, she loved him, and they were perfect partners for each other, warts and all (which is what they learned like a year and a half ago, back in ‘Your Face or Mine?’). I think maybe she’s just trying to find a way to accept her loss and move on, because Zoe is in the picture now and Jo knows this isn’t really her Zane. “We don’t fit. I’m over it. I’m over us.” She’s telling herself that they don’t work and that they never did, but it is total B.S.

Fargo. I don’t have too much to say on this one. The little girl was incredibly annoying, but it was lovely to once again see how Fargo’s really growing into his leadership role and starting to believe in himself. And it was pretty sweet to see him stick it to this version of General Mansfield. That guy is such a dick.

Grant and the Consortium. While I enjoyed all the good character stuff in the other threads, I found Grant’s part of the story the most intriguing. I was totally blown away by the reveal that Grant and Beverly’s dad were the founders of the Consortium, and that the whole basis for the “movement” was “science should be about discovery, not about who can build the biggest gun.” It felt like an unexpected twist on a long-running theme for the series. Back in Season One, Henry always made the case that Eureka wasn’t living up to its scientific ideals, which were about bettering the world, not turning noble ideas into weapons. One of my favorite moments from that season was Henry and Stark arguing about the necessity of working for the government in order to make it possible to discover and create the things that will enrich and better the world (a point that Allison argued here). But given that Beverly and the Consortium have always been presented as the enemy, I was rather stunned to learn that the organization was founded on the same idealistic philosophy Henry espouses. Moreover, all their machinations are supposedly in service of preventing another tragedy like nuclear weapons being deployed in 1945. They might actually be the good guys!

Of course, given our history with the Consortium, I’m highly skeptical. Do we really believe they want to send Grant home so that he can prevent GD and Eureka from becoming slaves to the DoD? That they’re really working in the best interests of scientific discovery? That they want to “make a difference” and “change the world”? Really? Having come to know Grant, I absolutely believe that “noble ideas, not weapons” was the founding philosophy of his group, and that he had the best intentions. But I’m not sure the group has subsequently come to represent his ideals. Much like Eureka seems to have turned out “not how we envisioned the place to be,” I suspect that the Consortium may have lost its way, too. Beverly certainly isn’t making a good case for herself with all the lies and subterfuge.

Other Thoughts

When it turned up a few episodes ago, I just knew that Grace’s memory recovery device would somehow enable her and Henry to get to know one another better. However, I never imagined it would also play a key role in allowing several of our time travelers to come to grips with their current reality. Nice twist.

Grant: “Nuclear weapons. Technology’s most regrettable achievement.”

I enjoyed Fargo giving Zane a hard time about Zoe. He was assertive and looking out for his friends!

The first time I saw this episode, I was disappointed when Stark turned out to be a figment of Carter’s imagination. I thought it would have been incredibly cool to have Stark return from the ether, remembering the original timeline. But now, I’m glad he was just a hallucination. It would be cool to introduce someone from the original timeline at this stage of the game, but I’m tired of waiting for Allison and Carter to get together. No more monkey wrenches!

That said, I was still super jazzed to have Stark back for an hour! I really miss the dynamic that he and Carter had. It was delightful to have him driving Carter nuts again! Plus, Ed Quinn is a very fit and fine looking man.

Jo: “What? You don’t think we should be able to defend ourselves?”
Grant: “I didn’t say that. We build weapons to defend ourselves, forces our enemies to create new weapons to defend themselves. Where does it stop?”

Fargo: “Dr. Stark is here? Has he said anything about me?”
Stark: “Awww. At least somebody misses me.”

I absolutely loved the in-joke about Grant’s hallucination! “Tall leggy blond. Slinky red dress.” I was so caught up in the story, his history with Adam, and his role in creating the Consortium that the meta-ness of “head” friends didn’t even occur to me. Too, too funny!

I wonder if Zane hacking into the DoD system last week is partly responsible for making him look like the culprit in the EMP theft. Hopefully, whatever papers he tossed at Jo will exonerate him.

Final Analysis: Another really strong episode. Great character work, and very solid arc progression.

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Eureka: Stoned

… in which an archaeological resource is discovered at the construction site for Jo’s new home, and soon after people working at the site begin turning into stone.

‘Stoned’ was a really packed episode. We had thinly connected subplots for Zoe-Zane-Jo, Carter and Allison, and Henry and Grace, plus the business with Grant’s false identity, and the disaster-of-the-week! This week’s disaster was one of my favorites from the first half of the season. It was just so scary! Petrified Derek was creepy enough, but when Carter found the two guys at the construction warehouse and the one guy’s eyes opened, I was completely freaked out! Living statues! Eek! And the whole notion of slowly turning into stone from the outside in is just bone chilling. My only complaint about this story was Zoe suddenly being an archaeological expert. I know she’s bright and all, but she’s studying medicine and has previously shown an aptitude for robotics. How does this make her an archaeology wizard? You’re telling me there’s no one in Eureka better qualified to assist on the investigation than a pre-med student home on college break? What about the guy who didn’t want the Ancient Egyptians treated like a circus sideshow back in ‘Show Me the Mummy’?

On the character front, we had a lot of folks moving their relationships out of the “friend zone” and into the romance zone. I’m rather horrified by the Zane and Zoe pairing. (You aren’t alone in feeling like you are going to be sick, Jo!) Zoe is way too young for Zane, and seems in all other ways incompatible with her (their shared rebel pasts, notwithstanding). I don’t care how sweet he is once you get to know him, he’s not the guy for her. Poor Jo! At least Carter has her back and is not okay with this development. Hopefully, this “crush” or whatever gets nipped in the bud soon.

Fortunately, the other love connections in this episode were much more welcome. Carter and Allison! Finally! I knew that a fear of losing her very best friend would likely give Allison pause in pursuing things with Carter, but I’m so glad he wasn’t content to leave well enough alone. Those two are great together, and time and space have delayed them long enough. They deserve a shot at that happiness we saw way back in ‘Once in a Lifetime,’ and I’m glad it looks like they are finally going for it. Yea!

As happy as Carter and Allison passionately kissing made me, my absolute favorite moment this week was Henry wooing Grace with ‘She Blinded Me with Science’ in the rotunda. I loved, loved, LOVED this scene! It’s actually my favorite from the season thus far (and maybe the series). In some respects, it feels too soon for her to let him back in, given that she just learned the painful truth about his identity last episode, but Henry’s serenade was so whimsical, goofy, and heartfelt that I was as charmed as Grace seemed to be. I’m so glad that Fargo was able to help Henry give Grace “the passion and surprises she deserves” with a moment that perfectly recaptured the rush of getting to know someone. The whole scene made me grin as wide as I ever have watching this show. I’ve actually watched it four or five times now, and every time it makes me smile so hard my face hurts! I love the singing and the dancing, and Grace and Henry’s pure delight! And Fargo reveling in the romance of it all just tickles me to no end. “So romantic!” Wonderful!

In big plot developments this week, we got the surprising return of our old nemesis, Beverly Barlowe. Now there’s a Eureka face I never expected to see again! I’m kind of excited she’s back though, and I’m eager to learn what she’s been up to in this timeline. Is she still with the Consortium? Did she used to be the town therapist? Obviously, she and her friends have been on the lookout for the wayward Dr. Grant. They know who he really is and presumably how he got to the present, so they constitute a significant threat to the Eureka Six. I wonder what they are hoping Grant will do for them? And whether he’ll tell the others.

Other Thoughts

Loved Zimmer. She is so the contractor Jo would choose to build her house.

Carter: “Shangri-la facials?”
Jo (indicating her own face): “Well, this doesn’t happen by magic, my friend.”

The spa lady constantly critiquing everyone’s skin issues was amusing.

Fargo: “It’s like trying to hack the Matrix!”
Jo (sighing): “Well, much as it pains me to say, we need to get help from The One.”

Zane: “Anything else you want while I’m in there? Launch codes? Defense plans? TARDIS blueprints?”

Grant, Jo, and Fargo being forced to work with Zane was entertaining. And it will likely lead to further developments, since Zane is now aware that Grant isn’t who he says he is.

Henry: “What do you think I should do?”
Carter: “Well, um … You could find the person you’d be least likely to go to for advice. Ask them.”
Henry: “I thought that’s what I was doing.”
Carter (smiling): “I walked right into that, didn’t I?”
Henry: “Mmm-hmmm.”

More piano playing in Grant’s office. Love it! Larry’s shameless flirting was kind of funny, too. And sad.

I loved Carter trying to comfort Jo in the hallway after she discovered the guy she’d encouraged Zoe to pursue was Zane. If nothing else, at least this horrible twist gave us another good Carter-Jo friendship moment.

Allison: “I think that what we have, it’s … it’s really special. […] What I’m trying to say is, maybe it’s not worth the risk.”

Final Analysis: A stuffed, but delightful episode, with a freaky disaster-of-the-week, some good arc progression, and lots of great character stuff. Plus, Fargo-inspired romance rocks! “You blinded me … WITH SCIENCE!”

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Eureka: Momstrosity

… in which Carter, Kevin, Grant, and Fargo go camping, while the town’s Level 6 A.I.’s suddenly begin developing emotional attachments.

Well, that was a highly enjoyable episode! It ran the gamut from goofy to scary to poignant. I always love when they manage to milk a ton of humor out the basic disaster premise, but pair it with resonant character development. ‘Momstrosity’ had tons of really hilarious moments and dialogue, but where it really shined was the emotionally honest character moments.

Henry and Grace certainly had the most raw and affecting storyline this week. As I knew he would, Henry finally told Grace the truth about what had happened to him. How could he not? And how could Grace be anything but confused and then crushed by this devastating news? Tembi Locke beautifully played Grace’s disbelief, horror, growing anger, and grief upon learning the truth. Not only has Grace lost the person she loved and built a life with, but she feels completely violated by the lie our Henry has been forcing her to live for the last several weeks. Something like that has got to make you want to scream and throw things, then curl up into a fetal ball in an attempt to shut out the world. I’m actually amazed at how well she held it together!

The worst part of this whole situation is that Henry really is trying to do right by her, in the hopes that their relationship could have a chance. For obvious reasons, Grace wasn’t initially very receptive to the idea --- “There is no us! You’re a stranger. So please, just open up another wormhole, jump right back through, and give me my Henry back.” --- but I think some part of her recognizes that he was trying to do the right thing, and maybe that at his core, he’s still essentially the same man she loved, just without the shared history. Based on the care package scene --- which, of course, made me tear up --- it’s clear that she still cares about him and is perhaps somewhat open to getting to know this Henry and building something new. It felt like they left things on a painful, yet hopeful note. “Grace, you were right. I’m not your Henry. Not yet.” Perhaps after she has time to grieve and accept her loss, she’ll be able to let our Henry back into her life.

This episode also forced Carter to come clean about his feelings for Allison, both with Kevin and himself, and kick him into proactive mode. It looks like Carter is finally done letting other charming guys swoop in and steal Allison right out from under him. After being badgered by both Henry and Jo, and getting Kevin’s seal of approval, Carter’s thrown down the gauntlet with Grant and is actively going to pursue Allison. Woo hoo! I can’t imagine that Grant has much of a shot here. Carter lost Allison to Stark because they had history, but now he’s the one she’s got history with, and I don’t think Grant is nearly charming enough to break that pull between them. The only thing I can see making Allison hesitate is concern about ruining their friendship. As she told him back in ‘I Do Over,’ Carter is her true friend, and even though she’s certainly attracted to him, I can see her not wanting to risk the friendship and the possibility of losing him.

Other Thoughts

I’m so over the in media res opening. And they really didn’t need it here. The episode would have played out just fine without that opening tension builder.

I had to shake my head and smile at the Subaru product placement this week. Initially, I thought they were going for something relatively subtle when we got the quick flash of the car emblem at the beginning. But then when we got back to the car chase, they threw in a bunch of car maneuvering shots and some “features of the car” dialogue, and I had to laugh. At least they pretty much went with the “show, don’t tell” approach this time out. I’m not sure I could have suffered through another round of Jo and Fargo “pimping” their rides like last season.

EMO looked like the robot offspring of WALL-E and EVA. Too funny!

Erica Cerra has a very shapely silhouette. Can you really blame the perverted little toaster?

Henry: “This may be the strangest thing I’ve ever said, but I think I’m falling in love with my wife.”
Carter (laughing): “That’s not even in the Top 10 strangest things you’ve ever said.”

So, Henry was helping Grace test a device designed to help people with Alzheimer’s recover lost memories. I’m wondering if this device could be used to “upload” or otherwise share Grace’s memories of her Henry with our Henry.

Allison: “You can’t keep neglecting your EMO and expect to get a good grade.”
Kevin: “So I’ll lower my expectations.”

Kevin: “Man, I could get used to camping Dr. Fargo style.”
Grant: “Kevin, this isn’t camping.”
Fargo (proudly): “I call it glamping.”

I was surprised to learn Grant is a rugged, outdoors type. He’s never really struck me as a nature guy.

Kevin: “What are we supposed to do out here so we don’t die of boredom?”
Grant: “Well, only a million things, Kevin. We could hunt. We could fish. We could hike. We could climb trees. Or just sit here and appreciate the beauty of nature.”
Kevin (disgusted): “Dude.”

Vincent: “Virtual Vincent is refusing to take any unhealthy orders. He’s supposed to be the cutting edge in A.I. technology. Unfortunately, he’s a little too much A and not enough I, if you ask me.”

Andy’s attempts to woo Jo were wonderfully riotous. I particularly loved the poem.

“I think that I shall never know,
A creature lovely as my Jo.
This morning’s breath I smell so sweet,
With hints of cheese and last night’s meat.”

I also had a lot of fun with Andy being flattered and touched by SARAH’s actions. Zane deciding to let him keep the emotions at the end was really delightful, too. I loved that he and Andy played it like he was only doing it to thwart authority and to have a friend in law enforcement. I actually think Zane would have gone along, even without that coaxing.

SARAH: “Andy, I know we got off to a rocky start with me terminating you and all.”
Andy (smiling brightly): “Twice actually.”
SARAH: “I was confused. But now I see that you’re charming. And sophisticated. And I know it’s shallow, but I love your new adorable little face. And, well, I really like you.”

We got another small nod to Jo’s continued emotional struggles when SARAH pleaded for her understanding. “You understand why I did it, don’t you, Jo? It’s hard not having someone of your own.” Indeed, SARAH. Indeed.

Grant and Carter having a pissing contest over Allison’s favor in front of Kevin was just cringe-worthy. But I did enjoy their slightly more subtle “who’s the manlier man/cool dude” posturing.

So much bagging on kale in this episode! Kale can actually be quite delicious. Just cook it down in a little bacon grease. Yum!

Carter: “By the way, his running off is totally your fault.”
Grant: “Why? Because he didn’t want to see me embarrass you?”
Carter: “No, because you were talking about his mom. If you were bragging about going on a date with my mom, I’d run off into the woods, too.”
Grant: “Then I’ll be sure never to tell you about it.”

I liked the small bit of insight into how Grant’s continuing to adjust to life in Eureka (or not). He’s really struggling without his familiar support network, and likely so insistent on pursuing Allison because he’s got nothing else to cling to. He tried for an honest moment of connection with Carter --- “Listen, Jack, being a man out of time? Not as much fun as it sounds” --- but his timing was rather poor, so all he got for his effort was an angry retort. At least Carter made the effort to acknowledge his contribution to the disaster resolution. It’s got to be good to know he was able to help.

I was surprised Carter wasn’t able to immediately respond to Kevin’s question about whether he loved Allison. He even looked a bit flummoxed. Are we supposed to believe that he’s never really considered that question before, and thus wasn’t prepared to answer it? Or was he just thrown by Kevin suddenly putting him on the spot?

I wish they hadn’t already used the “get away from him, you bitch!” line back in ‘A Night at Global Dynamics.’ I remember thinking it was a wonderful pop culture reference when I first saw this episode, but that’s before I’d seen the whole series. This time it just felt like a tired repeat. Although I did love how TINY throwing it back in Allison’s face is what clued Carter in to her intentions.

Speaking of wonderful pop culture references, I loved Fargo naming his tent BUFFY and using the “Come with me, if you want to live” line from Terminator. He’s probably been waiting his whole life to use that one.

Jo and Carter witnessing Andy’s “morning after” moment was so awkward and hilarious!

Final Analysis: And we’re back on track with another very strong episode. I’m loving this season!

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Eureka: Crossing Over

… in which Claudia Donovan arrives from Warehouse 13, just as objects from the past begin materializing all over town.

So, after several weeks primarily spent exploring the emotional and psychological fallout from the timeline changes, this week we largely focused on some unexpected physical side effects of time travel. It turns out that when Grant hitched a ride to the future, exotic particles began building up in his system in response to him being out of his proper time. Then, after he and Henry reconstructed the core of the bridge device and briefly activated it as part of their ongoing wormhole research, the exotic particle development accelerated and began tearing Grant apart at a molecular level. Moreover, it turned him into magnet, drawing objects from 1947 to 2010, threatening to collapse the past and the present and presumably annihilate the universe. Fortunately, Allison and Henry were able to safely purge the exotic particles from Grant’s system, saving his life and, once again, averting catastrophe. The only hitch is that, now, Grant is permanently bound to this time.

This was a pretty intriguing disaster, and I loved that it was a direct consequence of the time travel debacle, as well as Grant and Henry’s attempt to repurpose the bridge device. It’s too bad their wormhole research went so horribly awry that Grant and Fargo subsequently decided to mothball the bridge device in Warehouse 13. I’m going to miss Grant and Henry conducting experiments in his garage. They have a nice dynamic, and the research gave Grant a sense of purpose. Now that he’s lost his project and has accepted that this time and place is truly his home now, I suspect he’s going to really double down on his efforts to woo Allison. Sigh. As charming as Grant is, do we really need yet another roadblock for Allison and Carter? I know Carter is highly entertaining in snippy, jealous mode, but we’ve been doing this a long time now. It is clear that they are meant to be together --- remember “There’s no time, no space, no way that we don’t end up together”? That was Season 1! --- so let’s just get to it already. Enough with the unresolved sexual tension. Hopefully, Carter will take Jo’s advice and get off his ass and do something about Grant making a play for the woman he loves. Fingers crossed!

On the emotional fallout front, Grace’s return from her conference escalated the pressure on Henry to come clean with her about what’s changed. I really do not envy Henry his current situation. He’s falling hard for Grace and wants to pursue a relationship with her, but he knows he’s not the man she married and he can’t, in good conscience, become intimately involved with her while only pretending to be the husband she thinks he is. But how can he tell her the truth? It would violate the agreement made by the Eureka Six and put them all at risk of being discovered and “sanctioned.” Moreover, revealing the truth could leave her “stuck holding onto a past with a me that no longer exists” and destroy any chance he has of building a future with her. Grace just wants her partner and her husband back. How is she going to feel if she learns that man is gone forever? It’s quite the pickle. I think Henry has to tell Grace the truth, even though he might lose her if he does. He has learned all too well the cost of lying to your friends and loved ones, and I firmly believe he recognizes that if you don’t have honesty in a relationship, you have nothing. He can’t truly build a future with Grace based on such an enormous lie, and he knows that.

In other developments, we got a funny, small moment between Jo and Zane, which featured the return of Military Ma’am and his accusations that she’s passive-aggressive. This, in turn, led to a really nice moment between new roomies, Jo and Carter.

Jo (wistful): “I catch these glimpses of who we used to be. And then they’re gone. [Pauses.] Are we having girl talk?”
Carter: “Nooo. We’re having guy talk.”

I’m so happy that Carter and Jo becoming professional equals has really allowed us to explore the friendship between them. I’m starting to think that even the weakest episode can be redeemed by a real moment of pathos and humor between those two. Great stuff.

Where ‘Crossing Over’ really fell down for me was the appearance of Claudia Donovan from Warehouse 13. I adore Claudia, and thought the idea of her crossing over to Eureka was chock full of potential. She’s a technology wizard and well accustomed to all manner of freaky business, so she seemed like a natural fit for this town. Unfortunately, instead of Claudia getting to really shine when disaster struck, she got to discover a missing tree ring and have a few brief moments as Carter’s snarky sidekick, before being shuffled off to a minefield to play romantic foil for Fargo. As noted in my season overview, I found the Claudia and Fargo flirtation nauseating. His nervous fawning was way over the top, and the whole thing was generally just very awkward and uncomfortable. At least I got some laughs out of her greeting Carter, Zane, and Jo with “Whassup, bitches?” and her later wishing for something really freaky to happen. Overall, I just wish they’d focused more on Claudia as a smart and capable young woman, instead of as a hot, geeky chick for Fargo to drool over.

Other Thoughts

I did enjoy the way the title worked on several levels. I’m always a sucker for a clever title.

Nice to see Carter confiding in Henry about kissing Allison and his frustration with Dr. Old Spice hitting on her, and Henry venting about his dilemma with Grace. I’m so glad those two are just friends again, without all the angry, bitter, mind-wiping subtext.

Claudia: “Jo, right? Doug said you were a major babe who kicks major ass.”
Jo (unimpressed): “Did he?”

Henry has asthma?

Henry: “Excited?”
Grant: “A little nervous. I know I can’t use the bridge to go back, but there’s something poetic about using a relic from the past to explore the future.”

Claudia: “But this is Eureka, right? I was kind of hoping to see something insanely weird.”

I really enjoyed some of the musical touches this week. Grant rocking out to ‘Car Wash’ and playing the piano was nice. And I enjoyed the ‘40s music when Henry and Grace were working on the car, then dancing at the end.

Fargo (re: Claudia): “She’s awesome, isn’t she?”
Carter: “A little shy though. Needs to come out of her shell.”

Loved Grant’s various reactions to Allison’s nanobots and their negative reinforcement programming. I got quite the chuckle out of his initial hope that the bots scrubbing his system meant he could just keep smoking, as well as him later deciding he needed a cigarette so badly that whatever pain the bots inflicted was worth it.

Between Fargo, Grant, and Grace there was all kinds of none-too-subtle flirting going on in this episode.

Grant: “Call me old-fashioned, but I prefer to eat my food, not drink it. Hey, Vinnie! Can I get a steak, potatoes, eggs, butter, two fingers of Scotch?”
Vincent: “A man’s order, if ever there was one.”

I happened to catch the subtitle on Military Ma’am this time: “Girls Just Wanna Have Gun!” Hilarious!

Grant: “I think it could be a quantum chromo dynamic confinement anomaly.”
Carter: “See, you’re just stringing words together!”

Claudia: “I do inventory, not bomb disposal!”
Fargo: “What do you think my job is? The Hurt Locker?”

Grant: “Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit smoking.”

Final Analysis: Not as strong as the last several episodes, but still several good character moments and a nice continuation of the season arc. I just wish Claudia had been used better.

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Josie’s Best of 2012 (Yep)

I’ve been wracking my brain for weeks now, trying to come up with an interesting Best of 2011 post. I can’t. 2011 wasn’t a good year for me, and whenever I glance over the lists of shows that aired, particularly in the first half of the year, I just remember how sad, stressed, and exhausted I was when I watched them. I couldn’t even do a real Best of 2011 book list, since (for the first time in a decade) I didn’t keep track of the book I read for most of the year.

Instead, I want to make a pre-emptive strike against the possible whimpery apocalypse of 2012. This is what I want to feel, 12 months from now, when I look back on 2012 and smile. This is what I want next year’s list to look like, FlashForward-style.


10. Hooray! I have a job that I’m actually qualified for, and that does not require numerous other part-time, low-paying, no-insurance jobs to raise my income above the poverty line. I’m having a great time doing good, important work—and I have plenty of free time, too! I am surrounded by interesting co-workers. I look forward to continuing to settle in to my new town, where houses are affordable and the traffic is never bad. What a wonderful life!

9. I never thought I would say this, or even that I could, but Doctor Who has gotten even better. After the sixth season’s epic tale of love and death in the time vortex, I didn’t think Moffat and Co. could possibly top the delightful convolutions that had come before—and I certainly didn’t expect a new set of villains even scarier than the Stone Angels! And wasn’t the Gamma Forest beautiful?

8. I was heartbroken when I heard that Fringe was going to be canceled (although I can’t say it was a surprise). But Fox’s decision to give the writers enough time to wrap up all the alternaverses and the love affairs (so glad Lincoln Lee is finally happy!) made the super-powered 2-hour season finale in May 2012 one of the best episodes of the year, if not the decade.

7. The epic moral ambiguity of Game of Thrones has gotten even saucier, even zanier, and even bloodier than Season One. The drastic budget increase meant more battles, more blood, and more Dothraki sea—and I, for one—think the show is even more mindblowing than the books. After all, how often do you see dragons these days?

6. Person of Interest, meanwhile, has finally come into its own. Executive producer and creator Jonathan Nolan finally won a victory in the battle with CBS’s insistence on standalone procedurals, and JC’s and Ben Linus’s ongoing and epic struggle against crime lord Mark Sheppard has been appointment viewing for weeks now. At first, I was wary about the decision to set the second season in the midst of the zombie apocalypse, but the inclusion of the undead only emphasizes the political post-9/11 undertones of the show. We are all zombies now.

5. While there aren’t zombies on Once Upon a Time, the writers finally decided to let their imaginations run wild in establishing inventive and exciting mythology. After a delightful start and a slow, slow buildup of the actual plot of the show in the first half of season one, January 2012 brought complications, double-crosses, and nuanced villains into the foreground. Snow White’s death (if she is dead…on this show, who knows?) is probably the highlight of this game-changing fantasy show—at least so far!

4. Supernatural deserves a big shout-out for concluding after seven great seasons. I know the last episode hit Billie hard: she’d devoted quite a lot of energy to reviewing each of the 148 episodes, but even she agrees that the ending was perfect for both Dean and Sam; all the heartache of the past seven seasons has finally paid off. I’ll miss you, Winchester boys!

3. Who knew that Community would come back from a scary mid-season hiatus even stronger than before? It’s hard to believe now that we were all so worried, back in 2011, about the fate of the little program that brought us such perfect episodes as “Remedial Chaos Theory.” I must admit, I got a little nervous when I realized they were doing yet another paintball episode for the third-season finale, but their decision to do a vampires-in-zero-gravity theme proved their willingness to sacrifice all dignity for the cause of ironic punch-drunk laughs. Thanks for the three-more-seasons renewal, NBC!

2. Speaking of vampires: how is any list about the best of 2012 complete without mention of the Vampire Diaries? From the alternate-reality Alaric/Damon hook-up to the real Elena, Damon, and Stefan mass orgy to Caroline’s even better superpowers (not to mention Bonnie’s tragic but welcome death), VD in 2012 has had more OMG moments than a Bible Belt tent revival.

1. Best of the 2012 has to go to one show—you know you’ve been waiting for me to mention it! Insert Show Name Here has finally given us the complicated storytelling, great characters, and exciting genre-bending action that we’ve all been waiting for since we realized Lost was ending. So far, ISNH has lived entirely up to its promise of compelling and fascinating mysteries with real, relevant answers. Finally, all that clue-hunting is paying off! What a treat it is to take part in internet theorization while safe in the comfort of knowing that it’s worth my time and energy.

And that's all, folks! 2012 gets a four out of four billiedouxes from me. Here's hoping for a great 2013!

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Merlin: The Sword in the Stone (Part 2)

“You have magic.”

I have a lot of mixed feelings about this finale. Overall I thought it was a good episode and a strong end to the season. But there was a lot about it that just didn't sit right with me.

I'm annoyed that Merlin's secret is still a secret. After four seasons everyone in Camelot, bar Gaius, is still as clueless as ever (none more than Gwen). Even Smallville wasn't that bad. I can understand the reasons for not having Arthur find out. He's spent the last two episode brooding about all the people he trusted betraying him. The last thing he needs is to learn that Merlin has been also lying to him all this time. Arthur learning Merlin's secret is a big deal and there wouldn't have been enough room in this episode to deal with that properly.

But I would've liked it if someone else had at least found out. Someone who actually lived to see another episode, unlike evil Uncle Lynley. It was great to finally see Merlin stop playing Arthur's bumbling servant and getting to be the powerful bad ass wizard of legend. He took charge and used his magic to kick the crap out of Agravaine and his men. But at the same time it was shocking to see Merlin kill someone (several someones, in fact). It's not the first time he's had to kill but its clearly still something he's not comfortable with. Agravaine may have been one of the bad guys but Merlin was clearly unsettled by killing him.

I know that it annoyed many, but I thought the sword in the stone sequence was very well done. I didn't mind that Merlin used magic to help Arthur. He's the one who put the sword there in the first place, so it made sense that no one would be able to take it out without his say so. It might not have been 100% faithful to the myth, but Merlin has always played fast and loose with Arthurian legends. Crying foul now seems rather redundant.

In most interpretations of the legend, Arthur is a humble servant boy, unaware of his true origins. Pulling the legendary sword from the stones was to proved to the to the people that he was the one true king and the rightful heir of Uther Pendragon. That wasn't necessary here. Arthur is already king. He already has the love and respect of his people and they will gladly fight and die for him. Pulling out the sword was never about proving anything to them. Merlin engineered this entire situation to eliminate Arthur's self-doubt and restore his confidence in himself.

The climactic battle to retake Camelot was a bit of a letdown. It all seemed too quick and easy. Not to mention inconsistent. One minute Arthur was wearing extra armour, the next it was gone. I even have a sneaky suspicion that some shots were just recycled footage from 'The Tears of Uther Pendragon'. Maybe if the BBC had given them a little more time and money it could've been as spectacular as the siege from that episode. Mind you, it would've been over in seconds if Alice Troughton wasn't so in love with slow-mo action scenes. Stop trying to be Zack Snyder, Alice.

Isolde's death fell completely flat. If they honestly wanted us to feel sad maybe the writers should've treated her as a character, not a plot point disguised as eye candy. In the end, it seemed the the only reason Tristan and Isolde were even in this story was so that one of them could die in the other's arms. This was all in the aim of giving Arthur and Gwen some feeble motivation for getting back together. So as one boring couple was torn apart, another boring couple reconciled and got married. That said, I did love the symmetry of going from everyone in the great hall chanting “love live the queen” to Morgana in the forest, alone and dying.

Which brings us to the big cliff-hanger. It wasn't what I was expecting. Actually, it was exactly what I was expecting. Just not who I was expecting. I honestly thought it was going to be Mordred and I'm disappointed that it wasn't. An appearance by Mordred, even if his face wasn't shown, would've had more of an impact and, considering his bond with Morgana, would've made a lot more sense. Plus, it would've spared us some really dodgy dragon CGI.

Merthur Moments

Just look at the expression on Arthur's face when Merlin goes back to distract Agravaine. Gwen wishes he felt that way about her. And shrug off that whole “You’re the only friend I have and I couldn’t bare to lose you” line all you want, Arthur Pendragon, we all know that you meant every word.

Notes and Quotes

--Morgana is blown to the ground by an invisible force. Merlin suddenly appears and Gwen still doesn't put two and two together. Gwen, you're a nice girl and everything but this is exactly why I was rooting for Morgana during your little fight.

--Pulling swords out of rocks is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses. You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just because you've pulled a blade out of a boulder.

--I don't doubt that Mordred will return next season. Whether or not he'll still be played by Asa Butterfield is debatable. I can see them recasting the role since Butterfield will likely be too busy filming Ender's Game to put in an appearance.

--Morgana continued to have her fun with Sir Gwaine. She's not got him fighting shirtless with a wooden sword. She's a kinky one.

--Some shots of the Great Dragon were reused from previous episodes.

--Richard Wilson has clearly had his workload reduced this season. Which is no surprise considering that he's 75. He spent almost all of this episode resting on his back.

--Merlin using magic to help Arthur pull the sword from the stone is nothing new. The same thing happened in the Sam Neil mini-series and Starz's Camelot.

--Its hard not to laugh when Merlin does his Dragonlord voice.

Merlin: “Why would I do that? Your head is already as big as your waist.”

Percivel: “You alright?”
Elyan: “I’ve been locked up with Gwaine for a week.”

Merlin: “You have to believe Arthur. You’re destined to be Albion's greatest King. Nothing, not even this stone can stand in your way. Have faith.”

Merlin: “Do I look like an idiot?”
Arthur: “Yes.”

Arthur: “I thought you said you had faith in me?”
Merlin: “Whatever gave you that idea?”

I'm not sure how to rate this one. I did enjoy it but it wasn't quite the grand finale I was hoping for. What do all you think? ... Read full post

Justified: Bulletville

Raylan: "You didn't happen to bring your rocket launcher, did you?"
Boyd: "I didn't think to pack one."

If they hadn't gotten another season (and I'm so glad they did), this episode would have worked beautifully as a series finale. The father/son conflict at the heart of the story was resolved, miraculously without Raylan or Boyd actually committing patricide, but with Arlo defanged and Bo dead. (Sons two, Dads zero.) Although there were a few semi-pointless non-arc criminal-of-the-week episodes, this first season was pretty strong. And it certainly ended with a whole lot of bang bang.

I'm not a big fan of gun battles, but damn, this was a really good one. What made it work for me emotionally was Raylan and Boyd, two characters I'm completely invested in, joining forces against Bo and the cartel. They're enemies, yes, but they were always on the same side when it came to Ava. It was even rather touching that Boyd said Raylan was the only friend he had left, and he clearly meant it.

Raylan is pragmatic, almost to a fault. He was actually expecting his own father to turn on him. I found it disturbing and utterly horrible that Arlo was capable of capturing his own son, knowing full well that the Miami cartel was planning to torture him to death. (Raylan shooting his own father in the arm didn't bother me a bit.)

Even so, what Bo did to Boyd was arguably worse than what Arlo nearly did to Raylan. It was bad enough having Johnny as his proxy beating Boyd down in the "other cheek" scene, but executing Boyd's entire flock? Boyd finding all those bodies hanging from the trees like some kind of horrible fruit was almost too much. (Exceptionally high body count in this episode, huh?) Unlike Raylan, Boyd never expected his own father to be so evil.

Boyd's grief, guilt and confusion was so moving. I love Walton Goggins as Boyd. It's nearly the perfect marriage of complicated character and outstanding actor. I particularly liked the way he looked in this episode, because it was an outward reflection of what Boyd was thinking and feeling. In several scenes, he held his body like a vertical black line, literally straight and narrow and much like a priest in a cassock. He tried to kill Bo, but couldn't quite bring himself to do it. What will Boyd be like after this experience? Is he capable of being a good man, after all? Is his belief system gone, or will he manage to hang on to it?

One more thing about Boyd. He was initially supposed to die at the end of the pilot episode, but the character was so intriguing that they decided to hang on to him. (And yay.) It's obvious that when they decided to retain Boyd, the racism went away. (And yay.) It has been implied that the Nazi crap was just a front Boyd used to recruit skinheads to rob banks for him.

Anyway.

It's not just the Raylan/Boyd relationship that I enjoy so much. Boyd's regard for Ava is so intriguing. The episode opened with Boyd coming to Ava's door and apologizing for lusting after her, as well as not taking action to save her from Bowman. And then he made amends by risking his own life to save her from his own father. I remember in the pilot that Ava said Bowman beat her once because she referred to Boyd as "creepy". I would imagine that what Boyd just did might change her opinion of him.

Wouldn't Boyd and Ava make a fascinating couple?

Bits and pieces:

-- They left us with one big question: did Boyd, with a bullet in his shoulder, manage to catch Pilar? Either way, Gio might be even more determined to get Raylan now.

-- What happened to Johnny Crowder? Did he die? And how many Crowders shot other Crowders this season? I lost count. That family is now a lot smaller.

-- M.C. Gainey was a marvelous villain.

-- Gary moved out, leaving the field clear for Raylan and Winona. Raylan looked a little shocked at that news. Maybe he's not quite ready to jump back into a relationship with Winona.

-- Art is likely to be unhappy about all the people Raylan shot in this episode. How many was it? Five?

-- Apparently, there is a Bullittsville in Kentucky, but not a Bulletville. But it's a great name.

-- The last moment was Raylan aiming his gun at the departing Boyd and making a "pow" sound. Perfect.

Quotes:

Boyd: "For years I lusted after you, and I was far from subtle. Well, that was wrong. And not only because you were my brother's wife, but because it was unseemly, unwanted and it made you uncomfortable."
Ava: "If by uncomfortable you mean it made my skin crawl, then yes."

Raylan: "A dozen barrels of ephedrine?"
Art: "Somebody is going into the meth business in a big way."
Raylan: "Or the folks in Harlan are really, really congested."

Art: (re: Boyd) "Maybe he's become some kind of vigilante."
Raylan: "Mmm. Maybe he's Batman."

Bo: "Who am I kidding. I can't hurt my own son. Johnny, hurt my son."

Boyd: "Do you believe in God?"
Raylan: "I do."
Boyd: "Tell me about your God, Raylan."
Raylan: "Well you know, white hair, long beard, sits on a heavenly throne."

Pilar: (shouting from outside) "All we want is Raylan Givens!"
Raylan: "I'm Raylan Givens!"
Boyd: "No, I'm Raylan Givens!"
Raylan: "Are you trying to be funny?"
Boyd: "A little."

Boyd: "I ain't going anywhere. They killed my daddy."
Raylan: "You came here to kill your daddy yourself."
Boyd: "Well, that's different."
Raylan: "How?"

Four out of four rocket launchers,

Billie

... Read full post

Justified: Fathers and Sons

"You are determined to be contrary, even if it gets you strung up from a tree."

The title of this episode could pretty much cover the entire season. Raylan versus Arlo, Boyd versus Bo. With Ava as a wild card stuck right in the middle.

I don't like Arlo, but he's sort of fascinating. That scene with the wire in particular had so many layers of duplicity. While supposedly an informant and in real danger, Arlo cheated both Bo and the feds out of the money while at the same time letting Bo know that he, Arlo, was under federal protection. I don't know what game Arlo is playing, but it seems pretty clear that the only side Arlo is on is Arlo's. He'll do anything to anyone to acquire cash and stay alive, and I'm starting to think that includes Raylan.

And yet, in the same episode, Arlo did something incredibly decent for a fellow veteran. It took a lot of courage to stay cool and talk down a nut job playing with the pin in a live grenade. That scene was sort of out of left field. It was probably there to show that Arlo has a good side. Raylan even looked a little proud of him for a moment.

While Arlo is all about Arlo, Boyd is a completely different kettle of outlaw fish. I loved Boyd preaching in the church on Jesus and the moneychangers. (Walton Goggins is such a charismatic actor. It's hard to take your eyes off him when he's on screen.) Boyd's witnessing was an outright declaration of war against his father Bo, who was sitting right there in a pew, fuming away.

Boyd, rocket launcher, truck, boom. No deaths this time -- yet -- but the Miami cartel will not be pleased, Bo will be furious, and he'll know exactly who did it. It's going to be a mess.

Ava went home. Why did Ava go home? Is she just stubborn? I don't think she's stupid, and she's certainly brave. It took real nerve for her to confront Bo like that, although I think it might have had the opposite effect. She might be just a bit jealous, too, because her knight in shining armor appears to be more interested in his ex-wife than in her.

Raylan and Winona reconnected in a nearly wordless way. She came in, took off her wedding ring, and that was it. What a lovely, meaningful love scene. (I guess dumping Ava on her wasn't enough to turn her off, after all.) As much as I like Ava, and I like her a lot, Raylan and Winona have a lot more romantic sparks. I just wish she hadn't put her ring back on before she left.

Bits and pieces:

-- We finally saw the face of the Miami cartel, Slimy Golf Guy. (IMDB says the character's name is Gio.)

-- The details on how to cook meth sounded so familiar.

-- Vasquez was back. I like Vasquez.

-- There's a new sheriff in Harlan, and she hates Raylan for ruining Mosley. Actually, I think Mosley ruined Mosley.

-- It occurred to me that the way Raylan confronted Arlo in Art's office was similar to what Boyd did to Bo in church. And in this same episode, both fathers told their sons that their mothers would have been ashamed of them.

Quotes:

Arlo: "You want me to be a snitch."
Raylan: "It's astounding to me that you're just now realizing that's why we're here."
Arlo: "What's it pay?"

Gio: "I hear he's not a huge fan of yours, either."
Bo: "Probably not. But the good news is, I can swallow that asshole with a short glass of water."
Is that eloquent, or what?

Boyd: "Brothers and sisters, I'm here to tell you today that bullet missed my heart, but it struck my soul."

Bo: "That there is Crowder gospel. You mark them damn words, son."

Arlo: "I just spent an hour next to a nut job with a live grenade. Turns out I ain't as afraid of dying as I used to be."

Ava: "You setting up whores now?"
Bo: "Why? You looking for work?"
It's unsettling how most of Bo's threats aimed at Ava have a sexual component.

Arlo: "I'm already paranoid, and we haven't even done anything yet."

Lots of unsettling set-up for the finale. Three and a half grenades with the pins pulled out,

Billie

... Read full post

Doctor Who: The Doctor, the Widow and the Wardrobe

Doctor: “Happy crying. Humany wumany.”

I’m starting to think Matt Smith was made for Christmas. He’s like James Bond, Superman and Father Christmas, all rolled into one. Tonight’s episode had it all: an action packed opening sequence, a cutesy fairy tale middle section, and an ending which could only have left the steeliest heart unmoved. In short, there was something for everybody. The denouement was nicely set up, the execution perfect, and the last fifteen minutes brimming with pathos, hope, and Christmas cheer. Throw in the Magna Carta, hammocks, a window disguised as a mirror, a mirror disguised as a window, and it pretty much had the lot. Even lemonade on tap. I know!

After the emotional weight of season six, tonight’s episode brought some much needed levity to proceedings. There was no real sense of danger. We all knew Reg would somehow turn up at the end. Christmas is, after all, a time for miracles. (Or so they keep telling us. Repeatedly.) Even Steven Moffat wouldn’t dare kill someone’s dad at Christmas. Instead, the Doctor cast off his season six broodiness, and clothed himself in a mood more conducive to the festive season. He was positively brimming with good will to all beings. Even David Tennant at his bonkers best would've been hard pressed to keep pace with Matt Smith's infectious exuberance. He was quite simply off his head.

In much the same way last year’s “A Christmas Carol” took its inspiration (and indeed its name) from the Dickens’ Christmas classic, tonight’s tale borrowed many of its core themes from C.S. Lewis’ “The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe”. It took place during a similar era (1940s?), featured a portal into a snow laden world, and even had a wardrobe. (A big blue, TARDIS shaped wardrobe.) It didn’t quite reach the dizzying heights of “A Christmas Carol”, but there was still much to love. Visually, it looked stunning, the kids were as cute as buttons, and the story itself was as Christmassy as a great big Christmas tree, wrapped in Christmassy tinsel, and decorated with big Christmassy wooden people spawning baubles.

It did, however, lack the cleverness and complexity we've come to expect from one of Moffat's stories. For me, Moffat’s at his best when he’s punishing our brains with his seemingly incomprehensible time lines. Tonight's tale was a little light on invention and convolution. Which is great news for viewers who found season six's plotting a little too involved. Personally, I like to be bamboozled. Of course, you could (and probably should) argue that you can't judge a Christmas episode by a season episode's standards -- and you'd be right. The problem with Christmas episodes is they’re not aimed at the typical fan. They’re aimed at a much broader demographic. So there’s always some degree of box ticking going on. Rip roaring opening sequence for the Dads. Check. Famous comedy cameos of people pretending to be in a Monty Python sketch. Check. Assorted Christmas paraphernalia. Check. Fantasy style mid-section for the kids. Check. Classic and New Who references for the fanboys. Check. Proper English accents. Check. Big weepy bit at the end for the emotionally unstable. Sob! I mean... check.

Tonight's episode undoubtedly ticked many boxes. If I have one complaint, it's that it was slanted a little too heavily towards the younger viewer. Last year's episode seemed to strike a better balance. It wasn’t until the last 15 minutes that this episode finally came to life for me. I got a real emotional kick out of Madge begging to be excused from reliving her husband's death. Seeing Lily and Cyril's reaction to news of their father's passing was equally heart wrenching. Claire Skinner did a great job of portraying a mother struggling to cope with her own grief, whilst trying to protect her unknowing family. Yes, the dialogue was occasionally overly sentimental and, yes, it did veer towards the cheesy at times; but, you couldn’t help but sympathise with her predicament. I can’t say I blamed her for keeping quiet about Reg’s death. It was an impossible situation.

I was significantly less chuffed with the underuse of Bill Bailey, Arabella Weir, and Paul Bazely. All they did was dump exposition in our faces, crack a few gags, and then scarper. Bazely, despite the silliness of his character, I quite enjoyed. Bailey and Weir just seemed to be playing versions of themselves. Which is one of the reasons I’m not overly keen on celebrity cameos. They’re often functional, but seldom anything to write home about. (I wouldn’t anyway. My folks hate Doctor Who.) Which is a real shame because I love Bill Bailey and Arabella Weir.

It looks as though the Doctor was wrong about not having feelings like Madge's. Despite his protests to the contrary, the Doctor's more human than he cares to admit. Him wiping away a tear at Amy's house was proof of that. And nice last minute cameos from Amy and Rory. Remember when they left the show four episodes ago? Has anybody successfully explained why that happened yet? Not that I wasn't glad to see them. On the contrary: Amy shooting the Doctor in the face with a water pistol was a real highlight for me.That's how I'm going to get rid of carol singers next year. Father Christmas, too, if he doesn't stop leaving me coal.

For all its faults, this was probably my second favourite Christmas episode after "A Christmas Carol". It's also the last time we'll be seeing the Doctor until autumn 2012. That's some wait. And no more Doctor Who Confidential? Thanks a lot BBC! Why don't you give me a nice paper cut and pour lemon juice on it?

Bits and Pieces:

-- Androzani Major was a nice tip of the hat to "The Caves of Androzani".

-- Nice dodge leaving Arthur and Karen's names out of the opening credits. I wasn't expecting to see them again until autumn, then suddenly, there they were. Karen was wearing a lovely Lund-esque jumper.

-- Madge goes up once in a plane and can suddenly pilot an Androzani harvester? Impressive! They're clearly exactly the same.

-- The high octane intro was probably best understood in the context of the prequel to tonight's episode. You can watch it here.

-- After "The Christmas Invasion" I have a profound distrust of spinning Christmas trees.

-- Nice to see the Doctor flying through the time vortex again.

-- It's a well known fact that slippers have absolutely no grip in snow. In real life, Cyril would have been flat on his back in seconds. Unless it was special non-slip snow.

-- Surviving acid rain in nothing more than a coat? Withstanding the vacuum of space in nothing but a tweed jacket? Christmas baubles that turn into sentient wooden people? Yep, all these things can totally happen.

Quotes:

Doctor: “Multidimensional, triple encoded, temporal interface... not really susceptible to pointy things.”
Madge: “Got it!”
Doctor: “Okay... suddenly the last 900 years of time travel seem that bit less secure.”

Doctor: “Kitchen. That’s a cooker, probably... and these are taps. Hot. Cold. Lemonade.”
Cyril: “Lemonade?”
Doctor: “I know!”

Madge: “Why are you doing all this?”
Doctor: “I’m trying to take care of things. I’m the Caretaker.”
Madge: “That’s not what Caretakers do.”
Doctor: "Then why are they called Caretakers?"

Doctor: “What’s the point of them being happy now if they’re going to be sad later? The answer is, of course, because they’re going to be sad later.”

Madge: “That man is quite ridiculous. You must stay away from him.”
Lily: “I like him.”
Cyril: “I like him, too.”

Doctor: “Oh, he’s good. The old bear in duvet, eh? Classic!”

Lily: “Where are we?”
Doctor: “The forest, in a box, in the sitting room. Pay attention!”

Lily: “I don’t understand... is this place real? Is it Fairyland?”
Doctor: “Fairyland? Oh, grow up, Lily. Fairyland looks completely different.”

Droxil: “Please tell me we can tell the difference between wool and sidearms.”
Ven-Garr: “We can tell the difference, Sir.”
Droxil: “Can we?”
Ven-Garr: “Not always, Sir, no.”

Doctor: “Crying when you’re happy? Good for you. That’s so human.”

Doctor: “Oh, aliens made of wood. This was always going to happen, you know?”

Lily: “What’s happening?”
Doctor: “No idea. Do what I do. Hold tight, and pretend it’s a plan.”

Doctor: “I’d imagine you’d prefer to be alone.”
Madge: I don’t believe anyone would prefer that. Stay close Caretaker.”

Amy: “If that is more carol singers, I have a water pistol, You don’t want to be all wet on a night like this.”

Amy: “So, you’re not dead.”
Doctor: “… and a Happy New Year!”
Amy: “River told us.”
Doctor: “Well, of course she did.”
Amy: “She’s a good girl.”

Rory: “Whoa... you’re not dead then?”
Amy: “Done that.”
Rory: “Oh!”

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